The Desperate Housewife in Me

One of the momentous phenomena of this century’s popular media has to be the TV show ‘Desperate Housewives’, a dark comedy about the housewives living on the imaginary wisteria lane. In 2004-05, the year the show premiered on ABC, immediately it captured public imagination. It even got mentioned by the then American First Lady Laura Bush at the annual White House Correspondents' Dinner of 2005. In her own words “I am married to the president of the United States, and here's our typical evening: Nine o'clock, Mr. Excitement here is sound asleep, and I'm watching Desperate Housewives— with Lynne Cheney. Ladies and gentlemen, I am a desperate housewife.”   

Before this show, there was hardly any mention of not so young housewives in the popular media. In arty and high brow kind of media these housewives existed but were generally depicted as ‘chronically depressed and mostly committing suicide in the end’ type. After the show, suddenly housewives in their 30’s and 40’s; managing tantrum throwing husband and kids, washing, cleaning and haggling; became sexy. We housewives, always have to deal with people from all walks of life: kids, husband, parents, in-laws, friends, snooty neighbours, kids’ friends, domestic helps, handy men, grocers and such, the list is endless. No one gives us any credit for our management or public relation skills.  We have been doing this since centuries without an MBA degree.

This show gave people like me voices and characters with whom I can empathise. Be it ex-career women Lynette Scavo now shut from the world with her brats, Martha Stewart-ish Bree Van de Kamp slaving away without a hint of appreciation from family, heart broken Susan Mayer looking for true love before it is too late or the sexy Gabrielle Solis craving for husband’s time but instead getting expensive gifts.

After the first season the initial craze got subdued but the show has made it’s mark in people’s mind from Canada to China. There are murmurs the supposedly cool and affectionate housewives who apparently don’t do any real work might be desperate.

Now the political correct term is homemaker but whom are we kidding the attitude of people towards us is still ‘housewifey’. This show depicts housewives neither as the sacrificing goddess nor the brainless bitch but in a realist grey shade. I, as a housewife, find the show very inspiring. The characters have this spunk and a never say die attitude. Let’s accept the fact men are just overgrown babies so if we lose it then who will save the family. So these housewives have been confronting (sometimes even physically!) the world continuously for survival of their family.

I have learnt so much from the show. Especially the housewives’ talent of getting things done by ‘hook or crook’, sometimes even bordering on soft blackmailing, has been a great education for me. Just the other day I went to buy just one small thing to our local grocer and had to wait for a long time because for some reason he went on giving stuffs to people who came after me with long lists. Even after telling him many times he did not budge. I waited and waited, in case you are wondering why then I needed the stuff urgently and this grocer gives the largest discount.

After sometime my daughter got restless and started playing with the varieties of rice he had kept outside. She started mixing those together, which the grocer obviously did not like and requested me to ‘control’ my kid. I started screaming at my daughter as I always do! But suddenly I had one ‘Desperate Housewife’ idea flash, I told him my daughter is like this only and never listens to me. So unless gave me my thing fast she could go on mixing his different kinds of rices. And guess what, I got my thing in a jiffy. So happy ending for this desperate housewife!